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A couple of months ago I was searching the internet, just trying to entertain myself when I came across a limerick the title of which really threw me. The name of the verse was An Interview with God. That just jumped right out at me and smacked me in the face. And I thought, “WOW! How clever, an interview with God. I wish I would have thought of that.” Then I thought, what the heck, why not interview Him.

So I got down on my knees and I said, “Dear Lord, could I have a few words with You?”
And He said, “….…”
Then I said, “I only need a few moments of Your time.”
And He said, “…….”
Finally, I said, “Dear Lord, I know You are extremely busy and You have more important things and more important people to address, but I really would like to talk to You for a second.”
And He said, “……”
Then I recalled that when I was in college I read Children’s Letters to God. It was an amazing little book of real children’s prayers to God, compiled by Stuart Hample and Eric Marshall and illustrated by Tom Bloom. (I don’t know if you ever read it. If not, you should.) The book impacted on me, so much so, that I actually copied down some of the prayers in my journal to help me remember to stay childlike and curious, and to adopt an attitude of wonder. I have succeeded pretty much in remaining childlike. The inquisitive and attitude of wonder part…well, I don’t know if I ever managed to do all of that. Actually, I still have that journal, and I still remember some of those letters, like:
Dear God, I think about you sometimes even when I’m not praying. From, Elliott
Dear God, Does it hurt a tree if you chop it down? If so, I don’t think anyone should. –Maureen
Dear God, We read Thomas Edison made light. But in Sunday school they said you did it. I bet he stole your idea. Love, Donna
Actually, God’s answers were pretty good too. For instance, He said that Edison didn’t steal the idea of light. He gave him the idea and told him to copyright it so that Lucifer wouldn’t keep the world in darkness. I didn’t know that, and I thought that was pretty cool sharing a wonderful idea like that with one of His children. Consequently, I figure that if God would answer the letters of children and give all sorts of ideas and copyrights away, He would certainly answer a little note from me. Therefore, I wrote Him this beautiful letter on my best stationary with my fancy letterhead.
And He responded, “……”
Then it dawned on me. Maybe I could get some answers by asking Lucifer my questions. True he would probably lie a little, maybe a lot, but I was thinking that I could separate the pepper from the fly dodo as they say. So I flopped on my couch, popped open a beer and said, “Father of lies, the god of hate, Prince of Darkness, Evil incarnate, Beelzebub, Lucifer, evil one, can we talk?”
And he said, “What the hell do you want?” His voice was deep, like the sound of water roaring from a waterfall.
“Wooooooo, ah, I was just wondering your Prince of Darkness, Ruler of Hell, Father of wickedness and abhorrence could you answer a few questions for me.”
He said, “First of all, quit trying to butter me up with all of those flattering titles. I can see right through that crap.”
So, um….what would you like me to call you?
Call me Satan; Lucifer sounds like some candy ass.
“Well, I just have a few questions for you, but before we get started I would like to establish a little covenant with you. I want you to understand that I am not here to sell my soul or to make any deals with you. I would like you to give me your word on the Devil’s Malevolent Book of Sin, whatsoever in hell that may be, that whatever I say in the course of this interview should be not constituted or interpreted as giving you, permission to take possession of, harness the power of, or otherwise cause me to relinquish my soul. Is that okay? Can I get your word on that?
“Shut up and start asking me your questions. I don’t have all eternity. Besides, with your track record, I don’t need to trick you into the fires of hell. You are already on a fast track to Hades without any help.”
“Reaaally, you are kidding…right?
Hurry up, and get to your questions.
Okay, okay, first of all, you are the Devil, the cause of all the misery and pain in the world…the Great Deceiver whose sole purpose is to destroy humanity. I am talking to the right guy?”
You got the right guy, but you don’t have all the facts. I don’t spend my every waking moment trying to corrupt the human spirit or causing decay within the human soul. I have a life too you know.
What else do you do?
To be honest, is that an oxymoron, me - - the Devil being honest…just a little comic relief. See I have a sense of humor, too. With all the people going to Hell these days, I have to have something to alleviate some of my stress and since I love sports so much I figured that would be a good place to direct some of my energies. Besides, athletes are some of my favorite leaseholders.
Now that you brought the topic of sports up, are you responsible for all the cheating and corruption going on in sports today?
Well, I don’t want to brag, but I have done my best to elevate sports to a higher level, or lower level, depending how you look at it. I am sure you have heard the expression “If you are not cheating, you are not trying.” That is what sports is all about. Of course, you know that is my quote. The problem is that man designed these ludicrous pure sports like track and field or that rinky-dink sport you competed in, powerlifting, where there is no way for a decent athlete to try, well, I mean cheat. You either run fast or you don’t or you lift the weight or you don’t…right? So, I had to come up with a way to give the really dedicated and devoted athletes a chance to cheat. That is when I came up with the idea of using illegal and banned drugs to enhance performance. Initially, it worked out perfect. The steroids gave the committed athletes a tremendous advantage over the pantywaist drug free athletes and do-gooders who have this idea that sports is pitting one person’s natural ability against another person’s natural ability. I mean, come on, how un-American is that? Like I said, if you are not cheating you are not trying…every American knows that. By the way, remember last year when Notre Dame was trailing UCLA with 57 seconds to go with the ball on their own 17 yard line, and you started praying to God to help the Irish…you weren’t looking for an unfair advantage were you? See even you, a goody-too-shoes, will cheat if given a chance. Well, you can stop praying because God doesn’t even like sports, you can thank me for that little miracle the Irish experienced last year.
Actually, I was kind-of-sort-of praying that no one would get hurt during those last 57 seconds…Ah, can we just forget about that. Anywho, you said the steroids initially worked. What happened?
Well, they still work, especially in a sport like powerlifting, where there is no real drug testing going on. To be honest, in powerlifting steroids are a God-send…don’t take that literally. The suckers who are drug free don’t have a freaken chance against my drugged athletes. It is a joke for a drug free athlete to try and compete against my chemically engineered athletes. They can’t even come close, the big dummies. The problem lies in sports where they do random and heavy drug testing. As you well know, it is not cheating if you don’t get caught. Unfortunately, a number of athletes are now getting caught red-handed using steroids. The testing is becoming more sophisticated, which means that I have to continually stay one step ahead of these testing programs. That is why I had to turn to human growth hormone over the last decade or so. Growth hormone is a little more dangerous, but it works really well, and it is undetectable. Of course, the really dedicated athletes don’t care if it is dangerous as long as they get an advantage. The stuff could kill them, but they still love it. It is all about winning no matter what the cost…that is how great athletes think.
Now, I am just playing the devil’s advocate, but what is going to happen when they get a test that will detect HGH?
Is that a pun you are trying to make….devil’s advocate…come on? Anyway, I am way ahead of you. By the time they get a test for HGH validated, there will be gene splicing to deal with. That is already on the drawing board. I believe it will be one of my crowning achievements in sports… producing superman by genetically altering the physical make-up. Trust me there is always a way to cheat when you have dedicate men who will stop at nothing to gain an advantage over a sucker. Look, I don’t have time for all of this…I have to go.
But I haven’t asked you any of the questions I wanted to ask you, like why do we have all of this suffering, misery, and racial unrest in the world? Why does Paris Hilton make all that money without any talent, and why is Barry Bond’s head twice as big as Jay Leno’s? And why doesn’t Brittany Spears wear underwear?
Well, why don’t you dial up your buddy God and ask him?
I did but he never answered me.
What does that tell you?
That He is out shopping for underwear for Brittany?????????????

“It isn’t sex that wrecks these guys, it’s staying up all night looking for it.”

For the past decade and a half I have been teaching at Albany State University, in Albany Georgia. At State I get an opportunity to teach a lot of different subjects. In fact, it is not uncommon for me to teach twelve different classes during the course of the year. Believe it or not my subject matter ranges from modern dance right up to advanced kinesiology. I like teaching such a variety of course because I feel like I am constantly learning in them. It is like I am getting paid to learn. It’s great!

Anyway, my favorite class is sex education. It’s an amazing class. We talk about everything in there from autosexual behavior right up to zoophilia. Naturally, I get plenty of teasing from my fellow colleagues. I walk down campus and they will yell out “Hey Judd, does that sex education class you teach have a lab on Saturday nights?” or they will say something a little more ingenious like, “Judd, do you give oral exams in that class?” Of course, I assure them that I do.

In all honesty it is not so much that I teach the class as I learn in it. Believe me, over the years I have learned some incredible things about sex education. For instance, did you know that fertilization is that stuff you put on your lawn to make it green or that fallatio is an Italian restaurant? And here is something else I bet you didn’t know. Cunnilingus is the girl in the dorm who lives across the hall from Nikea. Did you also know that ninety-nine percent of the men in the United States masturbate…the other one percent are liars. And here is something that will really freak you out - some people get sexual gratification out of exposing themselves to others - they are called bodybuilders. I’m telling you; ever day I learn something new in that class. It’s awesome!

What happened recently though in the sports world has changed our discussions in my sex class significantly. If you hadn’t heard the Minnesota Vikings took a sex education field trip on the good ship lollypop and shortly there after two cheerleaders form the Carolina Panthers pro football team visited cunnilingus not at her dorm room, but at a restroom stall in Banana Joe’s nightclub. Now my students have major questions about sex and sports.

For instance, the majority of my students want to know if having sex will have an adverse affect on athletic performance. Well, if you have been following the Vikings since their road trip on the Love Boat you would probably say unequivically yes. Interestingly, though that may not be the case. It just might be that the Vikings are as bad on the football field as thay are in the sack and neither of those two things have anything to do with each other.

Actually, the effect that sexual performance has on athletic performance is a rather provocative question - one that excites me, figuratively speaking, that is. In actuality, I have had a wealth of experiencing dealing with this very issue - empirical research not applied experimentation I might add.

A number of years ago at the Wide World of Sports Super Stars Com?petition in Sarasota, Fla., I overheard the former heavyweight boxing champion of the world, Joe Frazier, tell an aspiring athlete that two months prior to a fight he would totally abstain from sex. Sex will make you weak, I never did it before I fought,” explained Joe. “Besides, when I didn’t get sex, I would get mean as hell.” At the time I thought Joe’s advice was about as good as the swimming exhibition he gave during the Superstars competition (In case you missed it, Joe jumped in the pool, took eight strokes that propelled him three feet, and then went straight to the bottom).

I might have been able to buy the mean and vicious part, but as far as sex causing a decrement in athletic performance, I just didn’t believe it. In fact, I had read somewhere that a world class pole vaulter had set a world record less than one-half hour after he made love to his wife. Joe had to be wrong.

Then I met a world class high jumper named Bruce McDaniels who swore that sex prior to competition would indeed cause a decrement in athletic performance. He said that when he had sex before competition he jumped like well, a white man. Less than a year later, I met six world class boxers who told me that not only did they abstain from sex a week prior to competition, but the night before a fight they would actually ice down their genitals so that they wouldn’t risk having a nocturnal emission. Icing down your genitals sounds about as much fun as getting a rectal exam. These guys were obviously serious about what they were doing.

Still there was that Wilt The Stilt Chamberlain thing that makes you sit back and say, “Sex can’t be all that bad.” If you recall Wilt claimed that he had slam dunked 20,000 different females during his basketball career - which would have figured out to be about 5.14 ladies (I use the word ladies loosely here) a day. No wonder they called him “The Big Dipper.” Certainly sex didn’t seem to affect his performance on the court. Nor did it affect Babe” Ruth’s baseball performance who was equally notorious for countless liaisons. They didn’t call him “The Saltin of Swat” for nothing.

Needless to say, I started wondering if what these guys were saying had any merit. Consequently, I decided to look into the matter. A computer search of the research literature came up dry. I couldn’t find a single well-controlled experiment that was designed to determine how sex affects athletic performance. In an attempt to get some answers, I started interviewing the athletes with whom I came in contact with. I was amazed to find that a number of powerlifters felt that engaging in sexual intercourse the night before competition would significantly decrease their performance. I engaged in sex twice before competition and both times I performed terribly in the meet,” recalls an elite lifter who asked to remain anonymous. “My legs were rubber, and I had no strength in my hips or back.” I used to engage in sexual intercourse before I competed,” reported another elite lifter, but I soon found out that I totaled better when I abstained from sex at least the night before. In my case, sex seemed to make my legs heavy, consequently my squat and dead lift suffered. I guess like Rocky’s coach Mickey says, “Women weakens legs.”

Overall though, most athletes, including powerlifters, felt that sexual relations the night prior to competition did not impair athletic performance. In fact, some athletes actually felt that sex improved their performance.

“Actually, sex is a part of my precompetition ritual,” stated world class Olympic lifter Billy Gardner. “It’s relaxing. It helps me still my mind … oh yea, it feels good too.” Brooks Johnson, the United States Olympic track coach agrees (not with the feels good part, although he might if you asked him). “Having successful, as opposed to unsuccessful sex before competition has many pluses,” says Johnson. “It can be relaxing and fulfilling. For some ath?letes it has the same effect as having a good rubdown.” In my opinion, Johnson is either getting the best rubdown this side of the Gold Club in Atlanta or he is dating someone on the order of Cindy Celibate.

Interestingly, the American Medical Association’s committee on the medical aspects of sports, reports that if sex is a regular part of an athlete’s life, sexual relations the night before competition it will not cause a decrement in athletic performance. According to the AMA, the only way that athletic performance could be hindered by sexual relations prior to competition is:

If the athlete doesn’t get enough sleep.

If sex is not a regular part of the athlete’s life.

If the athlete believes that it will impair his or her athletic performance.

Unfortunately, the American Medical Association didn’t have any research to substantiate the aforementioned points. Of course, you would expect that the A.M.A. would be in the know concerning this issue. However, they’ve been wrong before. Don’t forget it was the A.M.A. who said that anabolic steroids did not enhance strength or athletic performance. In other words, because they (the A.MA) say it’s so doesn’t mean it’s always so. Still, they probably are the people with the information to make the best calculated guess.

When you really think about it, they probably are right. According to Dr. Ruth, the average bout of sexual intercourse only lasts six minutes and it consumes less than two hundred and fifty calories. ( Do you ever wonder who times someone having sex beside my old girlfriend) Notice, I said “average.” For a lifter, it would probably be six hours and a half million calories. Assuming the old cliche is true, that lifters get it up and keep it there. When you think about it, you probably burn up more calories in your first two or three sets of warm-ups. I would also venture to say that most lifters are in pretty good shape (with the exception of a few of our super heavy weights) especially compared to the average Joe Blow walking around. Consequently, they probably can handle six minutes of bliss a lot better than most people?from a physical standpoint that is. Still, all of this is just speculation. When research is conducted to determine the effects of sexual relations on lifting performance, we just may find out that it will decrease performance.

Come to think of it, I’d like to do that research. Anyway, until some research is conducted, your guess is as good as mine as to whether sexual relations will hinder athletic performance. So until then, you’ll have to figure out what’s best for you through trial and error. Look at the bright side though, the trial and the error is going to hurt so g-o-o-d.

Dr. Judd

Nobody can acquire honor by doing what is wrong.
Thomas Jefferson

Rather fail with honor than succeed by fraud.
Sophocles

He has honor if he holds himself to an ideal of conduct though it is inconvenient, unprofitable, or dangerous to do so.
Walter Lippmann

I want to talk to you about something that really disturbs me. I am sure most of you are familiar with honor codes such as the street code of ethics, “The Blue Wall of Silence” (ironclad police rule) and the unspoken code of silence in journalism and sports. These are codes of ideology in which people do not snitch on other people committing crimes, breaking rules, or engaging in unethical practices. Those who live by such a code are seen to be honorable people who can be trusted to stand steadfast by their commitments even though their behavior supersedes doing what is right and, often, moral. Conversely, people who tell the truth and take responsibility for their actions are considered reprehensible snitches and rats. For example, when Andy Pettitte testified to the congressional committee on drug use in baseball that Roger Clemens told him that he had used performance-enhancing substances, there was an immediate backlash of criticism and condemnation of Pettitte. He was called a snitch, a rat, and a dirty gutless bum by literally thousands of bloggers. Perhaps one blogger summed up the sentiments of most bloggers when he wrote, “Andy is a coward, a snitch and a rat. For God’s sake, he rolled over on his own father. No one likes a rat; how can anyone have respect for this guy? All he had to tell investigators is that he did not know and that he couldn’t remember Roger telling him anything. Instead, since he got caught using HGH, he felt that someone had to go down with him and that was Roger Clemens. Instead of manning up to it and taking the fall, he dragged his so called “best friend” down with him. What a friend. Andy Pettitte = snake.” Yes! That sums it up nicely.

Now, from reading a prolific number of articles and blogs, I will admit that the way it looks I am in the minority on this issue. I accept that distinction whole heartily. I will also admit that the origin of “stop snitching” which originated in the late sixties was essential and beneficial for the survival of oppressed black people who were being harassed by the United States law enforcement authorities. However, in my opinion, what started out as something which was necessary and positive has evolved into something that is insidious and destructive. What is the honor in doing something that is dishonorable? It goes without saying that calling such behavior a code of honor is an oxymoron. At best it is a code of disgrace.

Personally, what Pettitte did was the right thing to do. In the midst of all the baloney and hot air, Pettitte refused to pay tribute to a ridiculous tradition of concealing facts for the sake of protecting a teammate who cheated and lied. Instead, he stood up and told the truth. “I have to live with myself,” Pettitte said in his deposition. “And one day, I have to give an account to God — and not to nobody else — of what I’ve done in my life. And that’s why I’ve said and shared the stuff with y’all that I’ve shared with y’all today — that I wouldn’t like to share with y’all.” That’s courage!

The idea that people who tell the truth are rats actually perpetuates immoral and corrupt behavior. To paraphrase Earl Ofari Hutchinson, all of you are doing by voicing this no snitching nonsense is saying; PLEASE KEEP OUR NEIGHBORHOODS, SCHOOLS, AND SPORTS TEAMS SAFE FOR MURDERS, THEIVES, CHEATERS, AND LIERS, because that is exactly what you are doing…creating a safe haven for thugs and cheaters. It seems to me that is the worst kind of self-destruction imaginable, and your self-destruction isn’t just killing you; it’s killing all of us.

Let’s say just for the sake of argument that Clemens is guilty, which isn’t a real stretch of the imagination, considering that just about every one in America thinks he is culpable. What honor is there in cheating, then lying about it, and worse yet, trying to ruin another man’s character to save your own ass? That is cowardly…you do the crime, you do the time.

Let me ask you this too: if a person sees a rape or a crime being committed, should he just walk on by as if nothing is happening? I don’t know about anyone else, but I’d rather take my chances for standing up for what is right, instead of having to live with the guilt of knowing I could have done something to help someone. If it means getting hurt to help another…well, so be it. I would rather be a rat, even a dead rat, than an accessory to a crime. I am also willing to chance speaking out about what is wrong in sports, academia and any other institution or individual who is debasing our way of life. Call me a snitch, a rat, a stool pigeon, an informant…call me what you will. I am willing to do all of that for only one reason - IT IS THE RIGHT THING TO DO!

When I was in college we had an honor code, a real honor code, which stated that a person should not at any time, any place or for any reason lie, cheat, or steal, nor tolerate those who do. In fact, we were obligated to turn in anyone who did not abide by the honor code. Everyone who agreed to the university’s code of honor, which was everyone at the school, took that pledge very seriously. How serious…I will give you an example. One of my friends saw his best friend and roommate cheat on a test. In stead of reporting him to the instructor, he went to his roommate and told him to turn himself in. His roommate informed him that he had already turned himself in. This presented a problem for my friend because he had breeched the honor code. He should have immediately reported the incident to the instructor. Consequently, he had to go to the instructor and acknowledge that he had also breeched the honor code. As a result, they were both suspended from school. Neither my friend nor his roommate expressed any ill will towards the professor or each other because they both knew they had broken their code of honor, and they took full responsibility for their own behavior. That, too, is courage!

I’m repulsed by pathetic individuals looking the other way at wrong doing, teaching others to do the same, and categorizing those who have a sense of fairness and justice as rats and snitches. It is rather astonishing to me that children are being educated from a young age to honor these rather bizarre codes which in truth advocate dishonesty and corruption. Even more amazing is that the guiding principles of these codes have been embraced not only by young children, but also by adults who you would think would have enough common sense to see the absolute duplicity and hypocrisy in such a system. What you are doing is buying into this lie that you are better off letting thugs and liars go free because in some perverse distorted way you want to honor a code that supports deceit and dishonesty rather than integrity.
I will say it again, these bizarre and absurd codes are simply tactics that permit criminal and immoral behavior to proliferate, and I’m not buying into it…not for a second.

Dr. Judd

Anything that exposes the truth about drug use in sport is good for ensuring the integrity of sport.”
Craig Masback

Simply put Marion Jones is gifted. Even without drugs, Jones may very well have been the fastest woman on earth and arguably the greatest female athlete in the world. As a small child, she was great at everything she attempted…softball, basketball, track and field, tennis, golf, even volleyball. At age 15, presumable without drugs, she ran the 200 meters in 22.87 seconds, breaking the national high school record, and at the age of 18, she led the University of North Caroline to a national championship in basketball. There was nothing she couldn’t do in the field of sports at an elite level. Like I said, even without drugs, she was strictly world class. With drugs she became otherworldly…perhaps the greatest female athlete to ever walk the face of the earth. She certainly could out run just about anything on earth and anywhere else for that matter. That is the catch…with drugs she was wraithlike, without them simply world class. She clearly understood the circumstances, and she obviously understood the decision she had to make…a choice that would be difficult for any athlete.

Bruce McDaniel, a former world class high jumper, informed me of the difficulty of making such a decision. “When I was in my first year of college,” said Bruce, “my coach came to me and said that if I was ever going to make it to the next level I would have to start using drugs. I was by far the best high jumper on the team. Actually, I was the best straddler in the world. To be honest, I really wasn’t convinced that steroids were going to make me that much better so I begged off. Within less than a year, my competitors who were using steroids started closing in on me. Guys who were no where as good as I was were jumping right with me. I realized real quickly that unless I started using drugs I would never fulfill my dreams as an Olympic athlete. Believe me that decision haunted me for years, but I never succumbed to the temptation. I felt drug use was cheating, and I was concerned about the health effects. Of course, I never did realize my dream of being an Olympic athlete which hurts to this very day. I am sure that is the same decision Marion Jones had to make. I am not saying I agree with her decision, but I understand why she made it. The way it is today it is difficult to compete unless you cheat. That sounds terrible to say, but unless you are gifted, your chance of competing at a world class level are slim unless you use drugs. The fact is that drugs give you that much of an advantage. With drugs an average athlete can become world class, a world class athlete can become otherworldly…they work just that well.”

And what does this tell us? McDaniels summed that up nicely as well. “That old saying, ‘Cheaters never win is the furtherest thing from the truth.’ Cheaters do win. If you want to win, you should cheat…that is exactly what cases like Marion Jones and Barry Bonds tell us. Our children see that the way to succeed in sports is to cheat, and consequently many of them will give in to such temptation, especially when they see that the reward for cheating far outweighs the consequences. That is why I hope some day they can get on top of the drug situation and literally get cheaters out of all sports.”

At least today Jones is extremely remorseful that she cheated…NOT! As Mike Golic said, “She is sorry that she got caught…it is forced remorse, not genuine sorrow.” I would have to agree with Golic. I find it difficult to believe that Jones would ever have admitted she cheated if she had not gotten caught red handed. Let’s be frank she adamantly denied she had ever taken drugs for close to a decade. Worse yet, she sued BALCO founder Victor Conte, in 2004, for $25 million alleging Conte tarnished her reputation when he said on ABC’s 20/20 that he supplied performance-enhancing drugs to Jones. She settled that lawsuit on February 5, 2006. According to Conte, the lawsuit cost him a lot of money to defend himself. She also slandered her ex-husband, C. J. Hunter, calling him a liar and a cheat. Just as revealing, she wrote in her 2004 autobiography Life in the Fast Lane,“I have always been unequivocal in my opinion: I am against performance-enhancing drugs. I have never taken them, and I never will.” She also made this quote on Sept. 26, 2006 edition of The New York Times after receiving word that her “A” sample tested positive for a steroid at the U.S. Track and Field Championship. “I’ve defended myself against this. I said I never used performance-enhancing drugs. I’m for a drug-free sport.”

What does this tell us? Simply put that a cheaters can also be good liar. One thing I will say, though, Jones understood exactly what she had done. She not only apologized to her family, friends and supporters, but she also apologized to all of her competitors whom she had cheated. She acknowledged that her fellow competitors, teammates and the sport are paying the price for her mistakes and that her admission cannot erase all of that damage. And it certainly was major damage. Not only did she steal all of those Olympic medals from her competitors, but she also stole millions of dollars in bonuses and commercial endorsements. Bruce summed that up nicely also: “The gut wrenching thing from an athlete’s stand point is that you train your entire life to realize your goals. You do everything ethically and morally right and then a cheater comes along and robs you of all you worked for your entire athletic life…the opportunity to compete, the recognition and in many cases a lot of money. That is certainly how it was for me. There were guys who would never have beaten me drug free, but they went right on passed me because they were loaded on drugs. It is not fair and it hurts. I know a lot of people will say that everyone at that level is dirty. That is not the case. I never used drugs, and a lot of my friends who were world class competitors never used them. That is just an excuse for cheaters. Even if that were true, which it isn’t, that still is not fair to the guy who does everything right and does not make it to that level because his competitors were load on drugs. Who knows, that guy you never heard of may very well be a world class competitor if everyone was drug free. That is the problem; good people are being robbed of their dreams.”

Of course, Jones paid for her cheating and indiscretion. All of her medals, as well as her relay teammates’ medals, had to be returned, and she was required to repay an estimated $750,000 that she was awarded for her winnings. Actually, the financial penalty was rather lenient considering that she earned over $20 million in endorsement moneys from her victories. That goes without mentioning the money and glory she stole from her competitors. Australian Olympic Committee Chief John Coates echoes those sentiments: “It’s very, very disappointing for all of the athletes that competed against her (Jones). … I don’t think an acknowledgment now will ever right the injustice for those other ladies who were robbed of glory, money and opportunities. I would hope that she is punished thoroughly.” Darryl Seibel, spokesman for the U.S. Olympic Committee, agrees with Coates: “Our position on doping is unequivocal. Doping is cheating, and under no circumstance will it be tolerated. If an athlete cheats, they deserve to pay the price for their action.”

What can we learn from this? Perhaps Jon Drummond, a gold medalist in the 400 relay in Sydney summed it all up best: “Any use of performance-enhancing substances is a tragedy for the athlete, their teammates, friends, family and the sport. It’s like that old saying, ‘Cheaters never win.’ So no matter how glorious or glamorous things look, you’ll get caught and pay a price for it. It doesn’t help track and field at all, except maybe by letting the world know that people always get to the bottom of things. We shouldn’t be afraid of the truth, but it’s sad it came to this. I hope it never happens again, but I am sure it will.”

Dr. Judd Biasiotto

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HARD WORK DOES IT EVERY TIME!

as told to Powerlifting USA by Judd Biasiotto Ph.D.

Nevertheless, I remember we had this big anatomy test coming up and I asked Danny if he wanted to study with me. He said that he wanted to but he just didn’t have the time. He had to attend a retreat for his church. I warned him that he better study because the test was going to be a real killer. He assured me he would be totally prepared when it came time for the test. That weekend I spent every waking hour studying anatomy. I really got into it. By the time Monday rolled around I was ready. I met Danny right before class and asked him if he had studied for the test. Amazingly, he told me that he hadn’t even opened the book. I asked him what he was going to do. Do you know what he told me? He said “l am putting this test in the Lord’s hands. He will take care of me.” He then gave me this bright eyed look and said. “Trust in the Lord and all things will be possible to you.” I was right, the test was a real nightmare. The kind that separates the men from the boys. I was ready, though, and as a result I got a 97, the highest grade in the room. How did Reverend Danny do? Well, he didn’t even qualify as a fetus, he got a 23, the lowest grade on the test. Here is the point, the Lord helps those who help themselves. There is no free ride in life. You reap what you sow. If you’re not willing to work no one is going to help you, not even the Lord.

We all want to believe that there is some easy way to the end of the rainbow. That there is some magic formula for success. In fact, most athletes and non-athletes are looking for a magic elixir that will transform them into a superman over night. Well the magic elixir is a nasty little lie that can linger for a lifetime, a fantasy substitute for the reality that we have to work for what we get in life. I would love to tell you that one day I ate a big bowl of Magic Flutie Flakes, went to the gym, and turned into a world class powerlifter. If I had such a magic formula that by-passed the hard work phase, I would be instantly rich and I wouldn’t have the body of an eleven year old stamp collector. I would also be a fraud and a storyteller. The fact is there are no shortcuts in life. Over the past two decades I have researched just about every ergogenic aid known to man. I’ve read just about every book on human performance and I have visited just about every Olympic training center in the world. With the exception of dangerous and/or illegal drugs there is no alternative to hard work. And even if you are using such drugs, you still have to work. Nothing worth having in life is for free.

Let me tell you about this study that was conducted in the early sixties. It is a rather revealing investigation. A team of biomechanical experts went to the York Barbell Club in York, Pennsylvania in order to study a human phenomenon named Paul Anderson. At the time, Anderson was considered the strongest man ever to have walked the face of the earth. There was strong evidence for this claim. For starters, Anderson held all of the world records in both Olympic and powerlifting — a feat unequaled before and since. Consider this for a moment: At a time when the world’s strongest men were struggling to master 700 pounds in the squat, Anderson had already managed a 1200 pound squat. Even today, close to three decades later and with the aid of drugs and sophisticated equipment, no man has come close to cracking the 1100 pound barrier. Let me put that into perspective for you: that record would be analogous to Bob Beamon long jumping 40 feet, or Mark McGwire hitting 90 home runs in a year. It’s mindboggling just to think about it. Just for the record, Anderson is still the only human being to back lift over 6000 pounds, one arm press over 300 pounds, and neck lift over 800 pounds.

Not surprisingly, the research team was hoping that by studying Anderson they could find a physiological substructure or some characteristic that was responsible for Anderson’s awesome strength and power. They assumed that if there were a biological, anatomical, or psychological center of strength, then surely it would be found in Paul Anderson.

After considerable testing, they concluded that Anderson was indeed different from other lifters he had studied. From a biomechanical standpoint, Anderson’s body was almost perfectly constructed to lift heavy weights. However, they found that Anderson’s superior biomechanical structure was more the result of strength training - muscle and body mass have been shown to increase biomechanical efficiency - than good genetics. They thus considered that strength performance may be nothing more than a product of strength training - a process available to every athlete. In short, HARD WORK!

Although the study conducted on Anderson left a lot to be desired from a scientific standpoint, it did act as a catalyst for similar but more scientifically sound experiments. In fact, afterwards, a prolific number of studies were conducted to ascertain what variables correlated with world class performance. Interestingly, most of the research that was conducted supported the earlier theory.

Now here’s something you need to stick in your notebook: A series of studies conducted by John Lawther a researcher from Michigan, found that the number one variable related to elite performance was time spent in training - not genetics. According to Lawther, elite performance was due more to quality training than to exceptional inborn capacities. Lawther estimated that twenty hours of quality training per week for a period of eight years appears to be the amount of work required to reach a world-class level. That’s approximately ten thousand total hours. Apparently, a certain time is needed for an athlete to learn the most efficient methods and skills for enhancing performance. Even a would-be world-class athlete must learn the basics of the sport to build a firm foundation. To train twenty hours a week is, to say the least, very difficult. Yet, as Lawther emphasizes, it is twenty hours of quality training - with great intensity, not just twenty hours of training — that is required for elite performance.

I’ll go one step further and say that even prodigies have to work hard to be successful. You could be the greatest physical specimen to ever walk the face of the earth, but if you don’t eat, sleep, and train right, you won’t b around long. l don’t care how much talent you have, if you’re going to be successful - you have to work. You could be potentially the brightest person ever born, but if you don’t get the proper inputs, or don’t use them correctly, you’re not going to function very well. The same is true physically. If you want to be great you have to pay a price. You have to jump in there and get your hands dirty. There is just no other way. I believe it was May Smith who said “The only place you find success before work is in the dictionary.”

Larry Pacifico, arguably the greatest powerlifter of all time was once asked, “What is the secret to your great strength?” Pacifico fumed to his questioner in surprise that he had asked such an elementary question and replied. ‘There is no secret. Hard work … that’s what it takes, there is nothing else. Hard work does it every time.

SOME KEYS TO SUCCESS

* Don’t waste your time looking for shortcuts. Get it in your mind right now that in life there is no free ride.

* If you want to be great expect to work hard and long. Nothing worth having in life comes easy.

* Focus on what you’re doing. Don’t worry about the past or the future. Only the moment counts.

* Every day do something that will get you a little closer to your goals.

* Get a training log (preferably the one I published) and record your workouts as you perform them.

* Roll your sleeves up and get to work. It is the only way to reach stardom.

- DR. JUDD

IN PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS

as told to Powerlifting USA by Judd Biasiotto Ph.D.

When I was growing up, my boyhood idol was a guy named Bobby Guzo. As far as I was concerned, Bobby was the greatest human being to ever walk the face of the world. In fact, if the truth be known, I was totally convinced that Bobby was nothing less than a supreme being - a god if you will. It might be noted that I was seven years old at the time, and Bobby was my next door neighbor. I may have been a little biased, but I don’t think so.

What was so special about Bobby? Besides the fact that he was the only kid in my neighborhood who didn’t steal my lunch money he was by far the best athlete I had ever met and one of the most intelligent. There wasn’t a sport that Bobby couldn’t play, and there wasn’t a class in school he couldn’t ace. He was literally the Jim Thorpe / Albert Einstein of our neighborhood. What really set Bobby apart though was his work ethic. To this day, I have never met anyone who worked harder than Bobby. When he wasn’t studying his school work, he was either lifting weights, running or practicing some sport. It seemed like every minute of the day he was doing something to better himself. When other kids his age were partying, Bobby was working. No one, and I mean no one, worked harder. All the kids in the neighborhood would say “Bobby you never have any fun, all you do is work”. And I would think, maybe the kids are right - Bobby never goes anywhere, he just studies and trains. He really doesn’t have any fun. The strange thing was, though, Bobby was always happy.

When Bobby went to high school he was the same way. He was either studying or training. He never went to dances or parties. I don’t believe he dated that much. He would go to bed each night by nine o’clock and then get up the following morning and run six miles before going to school. After school he would go to the weight room for one or two hours, and after that you would find him at home studying. In short, he never had any fun in high school either, but he did win the Pennsylvania State wrestling championships in his senior year and he received a full scholarship to East Stroudsburg College. No one in our neighborhood had ever done anything like that before. I also noticed that although he never had any fun in high school, he seemed a lot happier than everyone else.

In college Bobby actually got worse. It was all work - no play.

When he wasn’t in the library studying he was in the gym training. The kids at college were always trying to get him to go out, but he seldom did, and if he did, he was always home early. He never drank and he never used drugs. His life literally revolved around academics and athletics. It was clear that Bobby’s idea of fun was a book and a barbell. Still, he was always smiling, and always in a good frame of mind. By the time he graduated from colIege he had won All-American honors three times in the sport of wrestling. He also graduated with high honors. After he exited college he was immediately hired as the head wrestling coach at North Carolina. No one in our neighborhood had ever done anything like that before.

Finally it dawned on me (It takes me a while to figure things out). Bobby never had much fun, but he was extremely happy. The point is that there is a major difference between happiness and fun. In fact, I’m convinced now that people who equate happiness with fun have some misguided ideas about the true nature of happiness. The truth is that fun and happiness are barely related. Fun is a short term feeling of pleasure that we experience during an event or act. Happiness is a long term feeling of accomplishment and contentment that we experience after an event or act. Happiness is a more profound and enduring emotion then fun. For instance, watching a powerlifting meet or a football game can be fun, but such activities don’t bring happiness, because once the event is over, so is the fun. More difficult undertakings such as training for competition and competing in a championship will bring you more happiness because they are experiences that are more perpetual.

Unfortunately, most of us have been deluded into believing that happiness can only be achieve through a fun-filled, pain-free life. Consequently, we have become a hedonistic type of society were pleasure is the absolute goal. As Epicureans, we are only concerned with wine, women, and song. We seek only the enjoyment in life and attempt to avoid it’s struggles by indulging in wild parties, new cars, expensive homes, everything and anything that we believe will lead us down the path to happiness. As mentioned, though, fun-filed activities do little to contribute to our overall happiness, because they are temporary and fleeting.

Yet people continue to cling to the idea that in order to be happy we have to have fun. As a result we have created a fun-filled world for ourselves that has led us to the exact emotion we are trying to avoid - unhappiness. In fact, America - the amusement park of the world - is plagued by unhappiness. In truth, unhappiness in America is near epidemic. If you don’t believe me, how do you explain these statistics. A recent mental health survey revealed that eighty percent of the Americans surveyed said that they were not happy and that life was a real bust. Eighty percent! And listen to this, one out of every five Americans wilI require psychiatric help before they reach the age of forty. Sixty million Valium prescriptions are handed out every year in the United States. Did you know that every year in America 27 thousand people kill themselves? Is that sad or what! And all of this is in America - the greatest country in the entire world - a country were there are more fun things to do than any other place in the world.

Obviously we are doing something wrong in the pursuit of happiness. Dennis Prager, a renowned author in the field of psychology, has an engaging theory concerning this very issue. He says “If fun and pleasure are equated with happiness, then pain must be equated with unhappiness. But, in fact, the opposite is true. More times then not, things that lead to happiness involve some pain. As a result, many people avoid the endeavors that are the source of true happiness because they fear the work and pain.”

I believe Prager is right. People are afraid to face the discomfort that inevitably comes with such things as athletic and professional achievement, physical training, education, marriage, and religious commitment. Many of us are surprised to find that happiness is not just ecstasy and pleasure. It’s also pain and despair. It’s confusion and failure, strife and struggle, discomfort and uncertainty. It is all part of the pursuit of happiness. Unfortunately, our naivete prompts us to be more inclined to choose painless fun over painful happiness. Consequently, few of us are truly happy, because few of us understand that true happiness does not come naturally. You have to work at it.

There is no doubt in my mind that genuine happiness is attainable for each and every one of us, but it doesn’t come without a price. Happiness means getting your hands a little dirty, struggling a little, suffering a little, and working a little. It means taking the responsibility for choosing and defining your own life. Perhaps Leo Rosten in his very special way, says it best: “Happiness comes only when we push our brains and hearts to the farthest reaches of which we are capable.” I’m sure Bobby Guzzo would tell you the same thing.

Judd Biasiotto Ph.D.

Brian Tadler just sent in this excellent link of Two Time World’s Strongest Man Champion Jouko Ahola explaining the importance of dead lifting for preparation of his World’s Strongest Man Competitions.

Check out the intensity and drive Jouko employs in his workouts that is partly responsible for his mammoth gains in strength.

Click here for Video

Thanks Brian!

Coach Craig

At 45 years of age Magnus does not show any signs of a man who is suppose to be middle aged. At this past weekend’s National Powerlifting Meet in Reykjavik, Iceland - Magnus who weighed in at a mere 265 pounds ritualistically took first place with a

• 770 pound deadlift
• 792 pound squat
• 572 pound bench press

Let’s give a hand to the old man!!!
Coach Craig